Reflections of Me

random things you may not know about me:

1. i have an apostrophe in my first name
2. my brother and sister both have hyphens in their first names – my mom apparently had a thing for punctuation
3. i’ve visited all fifty states
4. i sleep with a teddy bear that i got on my 9^th birthday; hubby is no longer jealous
5. the bear is in very good shape for a teddy that has been cuddled nightly for nineteen years
6. i had saved my brother’s “runny babbit” for him because i figured one day he might appreciate the nostalgia, especially if he procreates – i’m sure it got thrown away when my mother moved
7. i’m a firm believer that love is never enough
8. my backyard is the best!
9. i moved to the beach because a coworker’s untimely death reminded me that we’re not guaranteed tomorrow
10. i refuse to put anything off until retirement
11. i grew up raising ducks as pets
12. i also had a brief stint raising goatlets
13. my favorite number is 13
14. hubby is 14.5 years older than me
15. until we got married, i called him “my boy”
16. the first time we met, i called him boy… the first time he called me, he identified himself as boy… i asked “which one?”
17. i’m an overly nostalgic person
18. the literary character i used to identify most with was “caddy” in william faulkner’s the sound and the fury
19. i still do, even though i’m not that person anymore
20. i should probably put some thought into re-evaluating that but a part of me wants to hold on to that part of me
21. kurt vonnegut is my favorite author
22. my favorite books include vonnegut’s cat’s cradle, faulkner’s the sound and the fury, and clive barker’s imagica
23. some of my favorite movies of all time:  the shining, dirty dancing, the shawshank redemption, the crow, thr33s0me, amadeus, charlie brown christmas, seven
24. i lived next-door to a corpse for three weeks… in july… in florida… and couldn’t figure out what the god-awful stench was that was pervading my apartment
25. i’ll never not recognize the stench of death again
26. i came close to dying and had my gallbladder removed when i was seventeen
27. that week in the hospital was one of the best week’s of my life
28. i could totally be a demer0l add!ct – that stuff rocks!
29. i am a tv junkie
30. i don’t believe in regret
31. the things i should regret made me the person i am
32. my husband is my second true love
33. i was fourteen when i fell in love for the first time
34. due to strange circumstances, my feelings for him were always intertwined with another boy
35. i know that it was true love because, after a terrible event and years trying to hate him, i still love him
36. i believe in forgiveness but i don’t believe you can ever forget
37. likewise, i think it’s nearly impossible to re-earn trust
38. i am still good friends with two people i met before first grade
39. after all these years, i still have a tendency toward the macabre
40. especially in thoughts – i worry over ridiculous things
41. i got teased as a kid for listening to richard marx
42. i still like his music
43. and i still love bon jovi
44. i generally notice eyes before anything else
45. i have beautiful blue eyes when i have eyelashes
46. they are sometimes green and, twice that i remember, violet
47. my eyelashes started falling out during the gallbladder hospitalization when i was seventeen
48. i miss my mother tremendously
49. she’s not deceased (that i know of)
50. i’ve forgiven but not forgotten
51. i’ve had a long history of great friends suddenly having nothing more to do with me
52. i know it’s something i have done but i’ve never figured out what
53. i have many very clear memories of the first house we lived in in orlando circa 1983
54. one is when i was jumping on the couch with hard butterscotch candy in my mouth and fell on the coffee table face first – my front teeth got pushed up into my nose and i screamed and cried all the way to the hospital
55. i wasn’t crying because it hurt, i was crying because i couldn’t suck my thumb
56. i kicked the dr when he tried to cheer me up by blowing up a rubber glove and putting a face on it – he clearly didn’t understand that i couldn’t suck my thumb and WAS NOT in the mood for his crap
57. i never had much of a relationship with my sister growing up
58. she’s twelve years older than me
59. she’s one of my best friends now
60. my most embarrassing moment (i wish it had only been a moment) was when i ruined one of my best friends’ wedding
61. i’ll never write about it
62. i’ll never stop feeling badly about it either but i learned a valuable lesson from it
63. i have a completely useless college degree
64. i went to college to become a chemical engineer or forensicist
65. calcII ruined that for me – only class i ever failed in my life
66. i blame the nervous breakdown that i suffered after being robbed and pistol-whipped
67. i only met my grandmother a handful of times but i was very angry at her when she died for putting up with the things that she did
68. sometimes i am uncertain whether i like the person i am more than the person i was
69. i wish i could figure out how to be both