2018
11
Feb
22:50

we will not negotiate with…

   Posted by: arcanai   in the turkey

we are eyeball deep in the t3rr0r!st threes. oh. my. goodness. the turkey is seriously breaking me. zero respect. zero obedience. total attitude.

he’s doing hunger strikes… even his favorite foods, he’ll just refuse to eat on the basic principle that i’ve served it to him. of course, we don’t just roll over for that so if he doesn’t eat, he doesn’t get anything else until he does. we’ve gone up to four meals on the same plate of food before he finally decided he was hungry enough to comply. you would think that would be enough to bring him back in line but you’d be so wrong. the next meal, here we go again.

then there’s sleep… we had moved them into the same room a few months ago so that we could have a nice playroom. we quickly discovered that they absolutely could not nap together so the turkey’s been having to do his naps in his tent in the playroom. some days he does alright, a lot of days he just spends the whole time talking or singing at the top of his lungs. nights were going pretty well until recently. either the sequel will be trying to entertain his brother by jumping in his crib which, naturally, gets the turkey jumping too. or the sequel will be trying to settle down and the turkey will goad him until he gets up and starts the party. most nights, the turkey doesn’t fall asleep until almost 21:00 but now the sequel is getting pulled into that sleep deprivation and so we’ve had to start putting the turkey in his tent in the other room at night too. i suspect that we’ll just undo the playroom soon and be done with it but it’s so disappointing. i know that millions of kids around this world share rooms but we just can’t seem to make it work. epic fail on our part.

sharing… ha! our super sweet little boy who loved his baby brother and couldn’t get enough of holding him and playing with him has turned into such an ugly little green-eyed monster. the sequel can’t play with anything without the turkey pitching a fit and trying to grab it from him. it doesn’t even matter whose it is. the turkey can’t have any fun because he’s so worried about what his brother is doing. his frustration has turned to kicking toys or walls, punching furniture, and sometimes trying to strike out at brother himself. i swear, we have tried all of the psychology to get him over his jealousy and get him expressing his feelings in more constructive ways but no luck. we get the same kinds of reactions to basic requests and calls to clean, eat, or sleep.

he is seriously wearing me down. it’s a good thing that we wanted the kids to be close together because if this behavior had started before having the sequel, he’d be an only child for sure. i’m praying that my sweet little boy is still in there somewhere and that we’ll see him again soon. and i’m praying that the sequel goes easier on us because i don’t know if i can go through this again. i am most certainly not mom enough.

i just keep praying and reminding myself… he was a super easy baby… he was a super easy toddler… we had to pay the price somewhere along the way, didn’t we?

2018
11
Feb
22:23

poo, yes, no

   Posted by: arcanai   in the sequel

the sequel p00ped in the potty for the first time today. obviously, we’re not actually trying to train yet but he thinks it’s fun to sit on the potty like big brother does. he’s such a clever boy!

in other news, we have left the “yeh, yeh, yeh” stage and entered the “no, no, no” stage. it’s so funny when he just starts spouting off with it.

he’s also starting to fight his naps. i guess we’ll be dropping back to one soon.

2018
23
Jan
12:51

and not to be forgotten

   Posted by: arcanai   in the sequel

the sequel is making his own strides. he loves to sing and dance. he will try saying almost anything. he likes to count to three and say ABEs. he is incredibly affectionate with stuffies and with us. but he also has a horrible temper and runs from me all the time. i’m not sure how to break that one but “come here” definitely does not produce the desired results right now. he does not like to be left at the church nursery and cries as soon as i put him down. sometimes they have to take him to brother’s class to get him to calm down. i have been working on his birth book (yeh, about time right?) and it’s killing me how fast he has grown. i can’t believe my itty bitty is a toddler already.

2018
22
Jan
22:09

passing grades

   Posted by: arcanai   in the turkey

the turkey has had an educational resurgence here lately. he’s reading simple books, drawing shapes, writing letters (he wrote his name all on his own today!), and drawing stick people. he’s even dabbling in reading a clock and counting money. i’m so stinking proud of that boy! and the crowning moment of the week? one of the snowbirds has grandchildren visiting this week so she brought her granddaughter over for a play date this morning. while they were playing kitchen, the turkey made her stop to say a prayer before sitting down to “eat”. we can’t be messing up too badly, right?

2017
19
Dec
23:21

15+ months and counting

   Posted by: arcanai   in the sequel

i can’t believe how fast my little mouse is growing. he is full speed ahead on everything, no fear. he’s stubbornly independent but totally snuggly and affectionate. he loves, loves, loves giving kisses. they are wet and sloppy and completely fantastic!  he’s currently cutting his tenth tooth. he likes to squat down to play and can squat on his haunches for much longer than i can. he can correctly point to my facial features and is starting to identify colors and animals/objects in books. i’m thrilled that he’s finally starting to get into books! he is truly a parrot. it amazes me how many words and phrases he tries to repeat. he’s been heard to say:

  • mommy
  • daddy
  • baby
  • hi
  • bye
  • play
  • hola
  • moon
  • “lay down”
  • “whoo” (owl sound)
  • brother
  • ball
  • blue
  • “i love you”
  • please
  • 1, 2, 3
  • a, e, i, o, u
  • “choo choo”
  • diaper
  • shoe
2017
15
Dec
21:48

down the drain

   Posted by: arcanai   in the turkey

we officially started potty training with the turkey this week. i have no illusions that we won’t have accidents but, so far, i am amazed at how well he is doing. we’ve had five days of no accidents. i’m so proud of my turkey!

2017
3
Dec
22:24

epic fail

   Posted by: arcanai   in heartache

i’m struggling.

hard.

i am going through a black season of motherhood and i feel like an epic failure every day. it seems that all i do is harp on the turkey, telling him don’t do this and don’t do that. and halfway through the day i’m just too exhausted to even care any more. i want to cry all the time. i try. i swear i do. i get up every morning with a prayer in my heart and a resolution to be more patient and understanding and positive. and then i find myself yelling and threatening and spanking.

i’m not the mom i wanted to be. i’m not the mom i thought i would be.

Lord, heavenly Father, please lead and guide me to be the mom that you intended me to be; the mom that these boys need me to be. soften my heart, Lord, and slow my frustration. in Jesus’ name, amen.

2017
3
Dec
22:09

flattery

   Posted by: arcanai   in the turkey

the turkey has taken to flattery as a means to trying to get out of trouble. when i’m upset with him, he puts on his sweetest smile and says things like “i like your hair” and  “you’re so beautiful”. i’m not too proud to admit that the first two or three times, i just reveled in the compliments and didn’t really notice the manipulation. if he had been more prudent in his usage, i may have stayed blissfully ignorant for quite some time. alas, a three year old doesn’t have the sense to look at the big picture and ration out his get-out-of-jail-free cards. i quickly became savvy to his charming wiles. but, oh, it was so nice to hear such lovely words!

2017
31
Oct
15:06

a pain in the gums

   Posted by: arcanai   in the sequel

a couple days ago,  discovered that the sequel’s 7th tooth had snuck in with the 5th and 6th (upper incisors). i was tickling him and his wide open-mouthed laughter allowed me a glimpse of his upper right molar that was already half-way descended. how on earth did i miss that? i remember the turkey being completely and utterly miserable when his first molar broke through. the sequel’s been cranky but not enough for that kind of pain! today, i decided to look around some more and found that the opposing molar (upper left) is pretty close to cutting through too. i’ve joked with him plenty about just popping them all out at once to get it over with but he’s taking it to heart!

his vocabulary is also taking off like crazy. this week, he’s started saying “baby”, “bear”, “corduroy”, and “play”.

2017
28
Oct
21:59

potpourri

   Posted by: arcanai   in the sequel, the turkey

after cancelling last week due to fever and vomiting, the turkey had surgery yesterday to remove his tubes. although we did consider cancelling again because of last minute croupiness. it went well but they did find a lot more infection than they were expecting so that actually made me feel better about going ahead and getting it done. i’m just hopeful that when it all heals up, we’ll be done with the stupid ears forever. i seriously regret letting them do the tubes in the first place last year.

before we left yesterday morning, he made my day by saying “mommy, you’re so beautiful. you’re hair is so beautiful.” seriously, my heart exploded into a gush of weeping joy.

yesterday afternoon, he started calling me “mom”. i very much noticed it but i let it slide because i figured it was a passing fluke. this morning, while i was out running around town trying to find a last minute costume (thanks for the epic fail, amazon prime!), hubby texted me and said that he was calling him “dad”. what the junk?! i thought we had another 3 years or so before “mommy” and “daddy” went out the window. it’s heartbreaking. and, for whatever reason, hubby has been downright angry about it. i am trying my best to ignore it, continuing to use the preferred monikers, and hoping that this is all just a fleeting phase.

on the other side of the coin, the sequel’s 5th and 6th teeth have finally broken through so we’re hoping his attitude straightens up for a little while. he’s very proud of his “hi”s and “bye”s lately. he tries to mimic a lot of words so we’ve heard “hola”,  “baby”, “granddaddy”, “dog”, and other random parroting. he throws epic tantrums… like full-on throw himself on the floor screaming and kicking and the works. where did that come from? but then he also loves to “sing” and dance. and he’s a heck of a harmonica player. he keeps us on our toes constantly and, while it is exhausting, i’m loving it about him.

2017
12
Oct
9:43

togetherness

   Posted by: arcanai   in the sequel, the turkey

we moved the boys into the same room over the weekend so that we could use the other room as a play room. naps are still pretty rough but the nights are actually going much better than i anticipated. and they love spending time in the play room. we have big plans for it to make it a super cool place!

2017
9
Oct
9:54

plugged up

   Posted by: arcanai   in feelin bad

i have a plugged duct. this happened several times with the turkey and i was so pleased to have avoided it with the sequel but then BAM! and it’s so much worse than it ever was with the turkey. over the weekend, it was excruciating. in all honesty, unequivocally worse than childbirth. i nearly passed out every time i nursed. i spent saturday afternoon in bed with a fever and sunday wasn’t much better. the fever finally broke last night and it seems like something must have dislodged because it’s not excruciating anymore but it still hurts. i can see a plug and i’ve been nursing, pumping, and massaging (OUCH!) as much as i can handle but it just doesn’t seem to be going anywhere.

2017
30
Sep
20:25

under where?

   Posted by: arcanai   in the sequel, the turkey

the turkey got up with a burning desire to wear big boy pants today. not only did he wear them without any accidents while playing around the house, but we also spent most of the morning volunteering at the church and he used the potty and had no problems. i was so proud of him!

the sequel is all over the place. he’s running and climbing and loves picking up big and/or heavy things and carrying them around. he’s a hoot. his third tooth (top right) broke through this week with the fourth right behind it so he’s been full of the grumps. which i’m afraid isn’t the whole reason for his insane temper. oh. em. gee. that boy throws a full-on tantrum at the drop of a hat. he will growl-scream, sit down hard, and start kicking and punching he floor. it’s hilarious in a good-gravy-we-are-in-for-it kind of way.

2017
12
Sep
9:43

br3@$t is best!

   Posted by: arcanai   in the sequel

the sequel was born with blocked tear ducts. the right eye healed on its own around four months old but the left eye remained a gooey mess. it would clear up with ointment but then start again as soon as treatment stopped. i massaged the duct five times a day for months and months to no avail. the poor little thing spent half his days with his eye glued shut or weeping yucky goo. last month, a friend suggest i use my milk. um? ewwww! but i looked it up online and found a very large community of mothers touting this natural remedy. i remained skeptical but since we’d already tried everything and the dr was saying that surgical intervention might be necessary if it wasn’t going away on its own by his birthday… well, i was willing to try anything. for two weeks, much to his chagrin, i gave him a few “eye drops” every time i nursed him. i was astounded to see it clear up within just a few days. after the two weeks, i kept expecting it to clog up again but it never did. amazing! so i started using it on everything. why use eczema cream when i can just rub some milk on your skin? the turkey fell and scraped his knee? here, let me help you with that!

seriously, this stuff is a magical wonder healer!!!

2017
21
Aug
20:16

3 years

   Posted by: arcanai   in the turkey

i don’t know how three years have already flown by. it’s been an amazing journey and has taught me so much about God’s love for us. i am so honored that i was chosen to be the turkey’s mom. he’s a very special little boy and i couldn’t be more proud of him.

at three years old, the turkey is fully conversational. he can read about 100 sight words and can sound out even four-syllable phonetic words. his favorite books are his assortment of children’s bibles. he can count to one hundred singly or by tens. he can count to ten in french and german. he can count to twenty in spanish. he knows the alphabet in french and spanish. he’s learning more and more spansish daily, including all of the colors and many animals. he can do simple addition and subtraction. he loves singing and can sing the fifty states. he is a wonderful, loving big brother and is caring and compassionate to everyone. he is joyful and spreads smiles wherever he goes.

this morning, i asked him if he felt older. his response: “a little, mommy. <raising arm> do you see a hair?” i nearly fell on the floor laughing.